It's his birthday! Happy Birthday

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Posted by: patzy Original: 1/14/2008 3:15 AM Views: 44 Comments: 0 eProps: 0 Read Comments Post a Comment Back to Your Xanga Site

Monday, January 14, 2008

It's his birthday! Happy Birthday

it's fish's bday on the 14th! I really dont wanna remember this date! but it's been in my mind almost everyday! waiting for this day to come and go pass my life mega fast... so aint no longer another date which bothers me...

thinking of a way, how can i spend this day without thinking of him?

I really dont wanna know what he's gonna do for his bday since I'm pretty sure he'll find a way to have fun...and perhaps.. all I have in mind is... he's found a replacement to replace what I was gonna do with him...it's someone else now.. who spend his bday with him.... 1 thing I'm sure is... this chick wont make the cake I made for him last year.. lol...

I've learnt from this previous relationship... should never ever 'plan ahead' of what you gonna do.... coz if you do.. what if shit happens... you cant do what you planned to do anymore.. will only disappoint/upset/hurt you...

I really would love to wish him happy birthday... but I know I shouldnt...

so i wont... and i know he doesnt read my xanga... so I can just say 'happy birthday' to him in here... so he wont get this message!

He didnt wish me happy birthday on my birthday... and i know he remembers my bday..but just chose not to say anything to me... but deleted me on facebook on my birthday... lol...

so i shouldnt say anything back to him on his birthday either...
it's been sooooooooo silly of me... when i was walking round the shops... i've seen some stuff I know he'll like it... i've even have the thought .. if he's still my bf, I will buy this for him.... wanna see his smiley face when he sees it..
really silly of me... i shouldnt even have those thoughts anymore...
maybe i do care about him far tooo much...should start care for myself instead...
I should treat him as 'he's dead'... he doesnt exist in this world anymore... perhaps... i might start to care less...

I really hope this year will be the last fish's birthday I'll ever remember...
lets hope so....

Posted 1/14/2008 3:15 AM - 44 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments